Me being - in a pretty screwed up situation

haha.
just look at that!!

the downhill tumble of me through the whole of last week.

-on monday i took my driving test.
and i passed!! i was so happy. so elated.
i wanted to tell everyone about it.

-on tuesday, in the morning. i was sitting in the office minding my own business and was scolded by my captain.
well, perhaps its due to my ignorance or what. but apparantly i was supposed to be downstairs inside the classroom looking after the trainees instead.
well. that just spoilt my entire day.
and it killed the atmosphere of my passing of my driving test.
it sure did.

-wednesday was quite alright.

-thursday, i was almost charged in the office because i missed out on rept.
rept's some time keeper thing that nsfs are assigned to do sometimes.
that one was not that bad because i believe i have substantial reason to escape the charges.

(then came thursday's night training.)

it was one faithful night at hougang mrt station. i had to miss out on a birthday celebration with a friend because of night training.
i reached the station at around 12 mid night. but did not report to my captain who was waiting downstairs.
well. i was arranging the food that was brought over to the station and my senior, well. he said that we'll just wait for someone to call before we go down to report.
and what a great idea it was!!

we went down and my captain was pretty pissed off already.
then okay, thats not all.
we forgot to bring some safety vests and some equipments for training that night.
BAM!! thats it, my captain snapped.
through out the training he was in such a foul mood.
ignoring me as i ran his other minor errands.

okay. then training ended.
he "summoned" me and my senior over and were being scolded like nobody's business. with his spit flying all over the place.
yup. then came the judgement.
he said that he's going to charge us by sending us into the detention barracks.
and that sums up my entire week.

well, it destroyed my long weekend. it really did.
to think that when i report to work on tuesday, i'm definitely going to get charged.
i'm not going through a fantastic time right now.

and any prayer i can get is appreciated.
haha.
all i can do is force a smile and pretend that nothing's gonna happen.
how did things turn out so bad.

when i was sharing with srimal on friday how my whole week went.
he shared with me how David went through his trying period.
he's life was at stake. Saul was after his life.
yet God delivered. not only David was saved, he became king.

in God i hold my faith in.
in God whom i trust.
any persecutions i'm about to face, i pray that i'm ready to do it with Him.

Me being - a driver soon (hopefully)

it has been too long a ride. i just pray for it to finish soon.

its so tiring to juggle work, ministry and learning driving at the same time.
what's worse is that i'm only one test away from getting my driving license.

and tomorrow's the faithful day where i get the chance to take the test again.
not trying to think so much. just hoping that the route will be a short and simple one. plus no screw ups in the circuit.
haha.

i've flunked twice and tmr will be the third. anything more than 3 times is really very embarrassing. especially me being a guy. who's supposed to find practical things easier.
or so the stereotype points toward.

anyways really am crossing my fingers now. hoping to be a driver by 13 may 2008.
wahahaha.
and one day look back at tomorrow and thank God for it.

Me being - pressed with expectations

money money and more money.
i just dont dig this.

its just too sad a life to be living for money. and i realise how sad people around me are living their life. its so pathetic.
really.

u dont get the kind of enjoyment everytime u work. u worry about not having enough with u're at home. u are stressed over it all the time even when u sleep.

what's the deal with it anyways. bullshit.

and being the eldest doesnt help one bit at all.
with all the expectations pressing down on me.
i want to get another diploma, or a degree.

but what its already laid out for me to grad from poly and start working 5 years from now.
don't i get a say in this?
do i have be in a situation where i juggle with work and studies at the same time?

i dont wish to be in that situation.
but what say do i have in this.

i'm expected to be paying for the house 5 years from now. ya, maybe pay with a job that pays 5/hr. that helps alot doesnt it!

maybe its time to grow up. time for me to start paying for ur bills and taxes.
and perhaps i'll do it.
oh yea. i will.
but i really dont see me being part of this money-minded household.